Almost there

Tomorrow afternoon we are being visited by our Social Worker for her mandatory 6-month follow-up visit. This is our second last step in becoming a forever family (in the eyes of the law). The last step is our court date. After tomorrow's visit, Sandra files a report to the Ministry and our court date is assigned after it is reviewed. We are hoping to be in court before the end 2006.

This is somewhat similar to Russia (for those of you just tuning in, we were waiting to adopt from Russia when received THEE call about our son, a domestic, private adoption). The big difference between what we are doing and the Russian process is that we were able to have our son home with us from (almost) the beginning....definitely makes the wait for a court date a lot easier!!! One other significant difference is that we don't have to be present in court. Of course, we are going because we want to be there and it's a great opportunity to take a picture with the judge for N's Life Book...I really should start putting that together.

Even though N has been here almost the whole time, we are not considered his legal guardians. Our (his) lawyer is the legal guardian and he has the authority to name us the "caretakers". It's a bit strange because we can do just about anything we want. We can travel (in the country), as we don't have a birth certificate until after our court date to be able to apply for a passport. We are having him baptized at the end of September even though we haven't legalized the adoption. N has our surname. His health card is in our name, which was even issued to us before this day had passed.

So even though tomorrow's visit with Sandra is not stressful...not like the dust bunny inspection, I await it with a certain heightened anticipation. In a nutshell, she will be reporting on N's transition into our family, assessing his care and our ability to parent and whether he has bonded (attachment). Of course he's bonded...you would know that if you tried to hold him while Mommy was in the room!

I guess I'll tidy (the Angels were just here on Tuesday) up a bit to make sure the place is presentable.

I love this kid sooo much!

Yesterday, our little boy was six months old! It amazes me how quickly time flies. I know, such an overused statement, but when you have kids this feeling becomes more real than ever. It's amazing how much he already knows in such a short time.

So here's a few things you might not know about this little cutie:

1. Noah has many nicknames: Fuzzy Bunny, Grumpy Pants, Boo-Boo (which often turns into Bubba or Booby). He also gets called Fancy Pants, Monkey Man, Complainy Pants, Grumpy Guts or Twinkle Toes. But my personal favourite is Tooty McFartsalot...C named him that and it's soooo appropriate.
2. He loves his bath...which wasn't always the case.
3. When one of us goes into his room at night after he has wakened, as soon as he sees us, he rolls on his side, grabs his bear in a death grip, closes his eyes and opens his mouth for his soother. It's hilarious...even at 2:00 AM.
4. He is very musical. He smiles when we sing, sometimes he even laughs.
5. He is a dancing fool. He especially loves to dance naked (before bath) in front of the mirror. We sing "Do a little dance, sing a little song (instead of make a little love - the real words), get down tonight", then he burls his little feet on the counter, smiling the whole time.
6. He is vane,vane, vane. He loves to look at himself in the mirror. There is a mirror on his play mat and you can often catch him holding the mirror against his face and kissing (licking) himself.
7. He loves to look at pictures of himself (hence #6). He loves to watch the pictures roll over the screen of the laptop. When he sees one of himself with Daddy, he smiles. When he sees one of himself with Mommy, he looks at me then the picture. He's a smart little cookie.
8. When he's really excited he growls.
9. He almost always wakes up in a great mood. He greets you with a huge, beautiful smile, kicking his legs and flailing his arms in excitement.
10. He loves the colour red.
11. N can raise one eyebrow at a time. Neither C or I can do this, so he's developed this skill on his own.
12. He is ticklish everywhere...just like Mommy.
13. With the exception of a few, his favourite toys are the ones purchased at garage sales.
14. N is a Momma's boy. He loves Daddy, don't get me wrong. If someone new holds him, he usually cries and looks at me, as if to say "save me". When he doesn't cry (which is rare) he doesn't take his eyes off of me and will strain, stretch and twist to follow me with his eyes if I move or leave the room...no attachment issues here!
15. He laughs at the funniest things. When C says 'is that too tight?", he giggles. If we make a buzzing sound, he giggles. If I sing and flair my hair around, he giggles. He's such a character.
16. He knows how to flirt. A few weeks ago in a restaurant, as the waitress took our order, he looked up at her, smiled and touched her side ever so gently. Of course, she was taken with him...like most women are. We are going to have to beat the girls off when he's older.
17. He loves people, except when they try to hold him (#14). He especially loves watching kids...they always make him smile.
18. He is so eager to show his smile, except when the camera is on. Then he just stares at the red light on the front with his mouth gaping open...not his best look.
19. He loves the phone. If he's a little grumpy, I will pick up our cordless phone and either turn it on so he hears the dial tone or press some buttons...both make him smile.
20. He loves books. Mostly he likes to chew them, but he will always listen to the story first.
21. Napping in his crib is OK, but napping in the stroller, the car, outside in his swing or in church is so much better.
22. He has developed dimples...just like Daddy.
23. His bellybotton collects water, just like Daddy.
24. He loves being outdoors, going for a walk or a swing or just sitting on the front step and watching cars. When we rented a cabin up north in July, he loved the patio surrounded by trees. He talked to them everytime he was outside.
25. He's tough as nails. He constantly bumps his head and it doesn't even fizz him. He had is two six-month shots today at the doctor's office and he let out two little wimpers. I think I was more upset by the needles than he was.

There is so many more wonderful things about Noah...I will save some for later post. We have been blessed with such a beautiful boy!

Sugar Rules!

My baby is in the middle of a sugar rush. It's 6:30 in the evening and this has been going on for about 45 mintues.

We tried sweet potatoes for the first time for his dinner. We followed it up with some ripe banana. He's been growling, kicking, smiling, jumping and flaily his arms wildly...ever since. He can't focus on one toy for too long (at least much shorter than usual). He is now attacking all the toys in his exersaucer! It's like he's stoned!

It's the most hilarious thing I've ever seen!!! I just had to post about it.

K.I.S.S.

Easy does it for me. I like to do things in the most simple way. Time is money as "they" say. You might say I look for the simple way out or take short cuts. I say I'm effecient.

I like to cook and entertain, but I will (usually) only use a gourmet recipe that's easy. I like to take the easiest/quickest route when I drive. I will plan to do things in a particular order, so there is no need to backtrack or do things twice. I almost always try to "kill two birds with one stone". I don't know if I've always been like this, but certainly as an adult I have been this way.

So the problem I have is kids' plush toys. My son has this cloth book that just happened to end up in his highchair. Normally, this book is not used during his mealtime, but ours, to offer him some entertainment while we eat. He loves this book! But this morning, I forgot to take it off the tray and N put it in his mouth...pablum and all. What a mess! "Oh well", I thought, "I'll just wash it". Well, guess what...it's surface wash only! What?!?

Then I checked a few other plush toys...all the same. What are these toy companies thinking? Don't they know that kids barf, eat everything, drop stuff on the floor or in the dirt. Now I can only surface wash these things! Unbelievalbe. That's not "easy peasy lemon squeezy". I just might a sternly worded letter to these companies telling them how I feel. Who am I kidding that's not easy either!

I'll just ask N to stop barfing on his toys...no problem :)

Now that I know you're reading...

I've become obsessed with my sitemeter here at blogger, like most. I check it almost everyday and am amazed at the places from where In Our Own Backyard gets hits...all over the world. These lurkers don't usually...actually never comment. I want to know who you are.

But there was one I was particularily intersted in...an almost daily hit not far from home...and now I know who it is. We received an email congratulating Craig on his new job from my cousin who says she reads everyday!!! WOW, I had no idea my family was reading. It's a good thing I've behaved myself.

Now if I could just figure out who's hitting us from Germany?!?

Daddy's got a new gig!

Congrats to my hubby on his new job! It will be nice to have him closer to home and arriving home after work each day.

Some history: late in 2005, my hubby applied for a job with our region doing what he does in the city of TO. Working in our region would mean closer to home, far less of a commute and more money! The week we found out about N, was the same week he had his final interview. He knew he was a shoe-in (so did I) but the timing wasn't the greatest. He hummed and hawed about the interview. When we discovered that we were going to have to take N out of town for foster care for a few weeks and the timing of that and the time/travel committment for us for the following weeks, he decided to try and reschedule, citing a "family emergency". They were very accomodating and he was able to do so.

Unfortunately, the reschedule still conflicted with our committment to our son and C felt strongly (as any good Dad would) about being with him and forgoing the interview even if it meant he had to wait to get the job. So he called the interviewer (his prospective boss) and explained the situation. She was so supportive and understanding. She told him that they were going to have to move on with the process but would like to interview him when we were settled back at home...that was March.

About 2 weeks ago, out of the blue, the HR person called and said there was an opening and would he be interested...YES! He dropped off some required paperwork within a few days and they called him back last Friday to discuss a start date. WOW! Two days prior to that we were hoping and wishing that would happen. I said to Craig that we needed to ask "The Big Guy" upstairs for a little help, even though we thought that we were all favoured-out...apparently not!

So after the Labour Day weekend, C starts his new job. We're not sure which of the three offices he'll be in, but the furthest would be a 35-40 minute drive vs. his current 1 1/2 hour commute (each way). The closest would be about 25-30 minutes away.

We have been blessed again.

To Ferberize or not to Ferberize...that is the question

So I guess every parent gets to the point where they make the decision that (if their child(ren) don't sleep through the night) it's time to take some action. It's amazing that the second question I get asked after "how old is he?" is, " is he sleeping through the night yet?" Then I have to hear about their kids that slept through the night at 8 weeks or from birth (is that even possible) or whatever.

Our son is 5 1/2 months old and we have been having some sleep issues. I'm sure by writing this post, I will jinx all the hard work and success we've had over the past week or so..."paranoia will destroy ya".

Anyway, we were struggling with napping throughout the day - 1/2 hour naps or 4-5 short naps a day and then up a million times in the night. If N could talk, I'm sure he was saying "Um, can one of you two help me, I've seemed to have lost my soother again." So we came to a point where we wanted to get sleep. We've had many friends that have used The Ferber Method with success and others who have been lucky and their kids just slept through the night with very little or no intervention.

We decided to do a little research and have effectively (someone knock wood with me) Smitherized our son. We have combined three different and extreme opposite sleep plans into one and made it our own.

1) The Ferber Method - basically the jist of it is putting your child down sleepy or almost asleep and leaving the room. In essence you are teaching him/her to learn to fall asleep on his/her own. When the crying starts, you wait a predetermined amount of time, go in for 1-2 minutes for reassurance and leave again to wait another increased predetermined time. Then back in and out for a third increased time and then in & out for the same amount of time as the third until your child falls asleep on his/her own (ideally, while you are out of the room). So we started with 1 minute, then 3, then 5. The next night you increase your intervals and should have success after a few days to 2 weeks. The intervals work for us because we both wanted to go in almost immediately, so it forces you to stay out and let the child work things out.

When you go in, you're not supposed to pick them up...OK. But what we didn't like from the recommendations is that you're not supposed to touch them, pat their back, kiss them, etc. Also, you leave the room after 1-2 minutes whether they are still screaming uncontrollably or not. Also, "if your child vomits (from crying) go in, clean it up very matter factly without picking them up and leave the room immediately after." More research necessary...

2) The Baby Whisperer (Tracy Hogg) - She is almost the polar opposite to Ferber. She suggests putting the baby to bed in an almost asleep state as well and also waiting intervals of some sort, although she's not very definitive about what they should be and then she suggests when you go into the room to calm your child by patting his/her back and saying "sh sh sh sh" constantly. This combination is similar to the womb and apparently calming. She also suggests that after the baby is calmed you "observe" for a minute before leaving the room again, and repeat. We liked the calming him and observing part...even if we are leaving when he's still in some sort of awake stage.

We also liked her teachings about watching for the three sleep stages. 1) rubbing eyes and yawning, 2) the "seven-mile stare" and 3) the slow eye blinks (nodding off). It really helped to know those signs. All babies do this? you ask...yes they do. There will be 3-5 slow blinks before they fall asleep and this is when you put them in the bed. She describes this as a 7 on a scale of 1-10; 1 being totally awake and 10 being comatose.

3) The no-cry sleep solution (Elizabeth Pantely) - I didn't find an actual method here. Pantely suggests to do what works for you without letting them scream it out. She did say whatever you decide to do, you must be totally ready to do it and to not look back...so true. So if you enjoy the 2 AM feed or having your child in your bed or rocking him/her to sleep...then you're not ready to commit to any sleep method.

What we liked about her book was the various sleep helpers. She had some tips on how to get your child to nap longer. Our son had two 1/2 hour morning naps and she suggests that a child needs at least an hour, so she suggested camping outside their room close to the usual waking time and going in as soon as they stir to put them back to sleep with whatever method works for you...the soother is ours...at the moment.

She also has a seemingly great method for getting rid of the soother, which we haven't tried yet, but will. But it's a lot gentler and gradual than the Ferber "take it out and don't give it back method".

All encourage a set bedtime and solid bedtime routine that should never change. We do bath, close the blinds and turn on the music with N while talking about going to sleep, turn on his little lamp, feed him his bedtime bottle and read 3 books before relaxing him to a "7" and putting him to bed. Naptime is similar without the bath and bottle. After he wakes, we open the blind and turn off the stereo (the music is long done, but it's part of the routine). He has even started reaching for the blinds to "help" open or close them.

Smitherized: So our combination is the timed intervals from Ferber with the calming back patting and 1-minute observation from The Baby Whisper along with the napping suggestions from Pantley.

Whatever method you decide to use, you have to be comfortable with what you are doing. Don't just do it to get rest, but be uncomfortable with the reaction your child is giving you or wish you were doing something different, because you will probably give up and be more miserable. We have had success (please knock wood with me again). I must go now, as N is up from his ...a solid hour and a half...WOO HOO (again with the knocking of the wood, please).

Some of Life's Luxuries

It's so easy to take the simplest things for granted. Since N has arrived and especially since C went back to work, it is interesting what I now find to be a luxury. Sure going out to dinner to a nice restaurant or going to a concert or to a jazz club in TO are still luxuries...MAJOR luxuries.

Now the things I used to take for granted have become the REAL luxuries in life. For instance, taking a shower (when I want) is a real feat these days. Now the shower is a rushed experience during nap or showering with the door open so N can see me. He's becoming aware of his environment and doesn't like when he can't see me for a few minutes at a time. It's funny, because when I was growing up my father was always harping that I should be able to take a shower in 8 minutes...don't ask me why 8. I always secretly joked with my sibs that he could do that because he didn't have any hair. But, now I would make him proud. Eight minutes is child's play!

Out of milk, no problem. I'll just scoot out the the store and get some...NOT! Scooting out to the store requires careful strategic planning and has to be timed between naps or feedings. Going to get "just milk" is a major undertaking. So, if you're going to the grocery store with an infant, you better make it worth while and get more than milk.

SLEEP...need I say more!

I am not complaining...although it may seem that way. I would not change my life for the world. I love my son and every minute with him. Our life has taken an major paradigm shift. I not only need to have his day planned and scheduled, but my own too! Would I love to take a fifteen minute hot shower (with the door closed) or scoot out to the store to check out a sale or sleep when I want...sure...and when C is home on the weekend, we are able to do just that.

I can wait 5 days to have a little luxury...because missing out on a long shower, a hot sale or a few extra Z's is hugely outweighed by the gorgeous little creature that God has given us!













Now that's perspective!

Still Here

I know, I know, I haven't posted in a while and for those two people that actually read this blog, I want you to know that I'm still here. Life is hectic and I have so many ideas for posts, but I can't seem to find the time.

I do have to correct my last post (since deleted) to be re-posted...and then watch out 'cause I just might become a posting machine...or I'll just continue doing what I'm doing now which is reading everyone else's blogs and neglecting my own.

It's a long weekend here so we're off to the cottage...major family shin-dig with Beach Olympics, a "Talent" Show (for the untalented) and lots and lots of F-U-N!

Catch ya on the flip side.